Meet Clay!

Clay is my Valentine's Day Project winner and a great guy!  He is a 36-year-old professional who is looking for someone special!  You can follow his first 3 dates here and we will keep you updated on how things go.  Thank you to everyone who entered the contest and check back here and on the Mended Relationship Counseling Facebook page for future contests and giveaways!

Congratulations, Clay!

 

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Mended's Valentine's Day Project

It's almost that time of year again....Valentine's Day.  Maybe those two words conjure up feelings of dread for you because you aren't quite prepared for the onslaught of the "Every Kiss Begins With Kay" commercials you just got over from Christmas.  Or perhaps visions of teddy bears, heart balloons and chocolates with unknown flavors in the center make you cringe.  Do you throw up a little in your mouth when Sheila from Accounting gets her annual V-Day bouquet? :)

Do you want this year to be different? Well, keep reading!

For the upcoming holiday, I am going to gift one lucky Kansas City-area single with a Valentine's Day he or she won't soon forget, complete with 6 free date coaching sessions, a free makeover and 3 free dinner dates with 3 eligible bachelors or bachelorettes hand-selected by Yours Truly!

If you are single, over the age of 18, and feel this year is YOUR YEAR, e-mail me at krystal@mendedkc.com and attach a video clip of no more than 1 minute explaining why you are the best candidate for this project!

The winner must be willing to be profiled on my website and Facebook page so the Mended community can follow your journey.  The winner also must agree to my using his or her story for marketing purposes.

Applicants who are not selected still win, because they can utilize my date coaching services at a discounted rate ($50/session instead of my regular price of $75).

For questions, call 816-200-7626 or email me at krystal@mendedkc.com.

I will announce the winning bachelor or bachelorette February 1st on Facebook!

Why is Self-Worth Important?

I have been so surprised by many things during the year and a half that I have been counseling.  However, nothing has surprised me as much as how a person's lack of self-worth seems to ravage their life.  A deficit in self-worth can lead to making all kinds of destructive decisions, such as choosing an abusive partner, falling into a food addiction, or sabotaging attempts to better oneself in other ways.

I believe that every person was created with a unique value and light that many times they themselves cannot see.  As a therapist, I feel it is my role to help my clients see that value, celebrate their unique qualities, and move past those self-sabotaging tendencies.  

If I can help you rebuild your self-worth (or discover it in the first place), please reach out to me and set up an appointment.  I can't guarantee your life will change overnight, but with some hard work, it can change.

-Krystal

So, What is a Dating Coach?

So, what's a dating coach? And, why would I need one?

I have worked with clients whose spouses have passed away unexpectedly or who have not been "on the market" for many years due to a long-term relationship. Some of them haven't dated since the 1980's! How times have changed. Their bodies don't look the same, they wouldn't even know how to download a dating app, or what to do if someone "swiped right" on them anyway.

I work with people whose self-esteem has been so shattered by a blindside divorce that they can't even imagine putting themselves out there again anyway. I work with sweet, lonely hearts who couldn't imagine someone would want them. I assure them that they have so much to offer and all it takes is finding the right fit.

If you find yourself in the Kansas City area and would like help navigating the dating scene, working on your confidence, or putting together a winning online dating profile, give me a call at Mended Relationship Counseling at 816-200-7626. Please visit our website at mendedkc.com for more information on all of our counseling services.

Dating doesn't have to be dreadful!

Ready for the Holidays?

Family gatherings, turkey dinners, football games and Santa Claus...many of us enjoy spending time with our loved ones during this time of year.  But, for some of us, family gatherings bring a special kind of stress and anxiety that makes us dread those get-togethers.  So, how do we not only survive but THRIVE during the holiday season?

The magical word is "boundaries".  If your Great Aunt Martha (all names have been changed to protect the guilty) asks you every single Thanksgiving WHY you have not found a boyfriend, this year might be the year to let her know that you are very happily single and do not need a man to make you happy!  If you can't stand the way your brothers always fight with one another, make it your mission to take the young cousins outside to play tag in the yard.  Or, as a good friend once suggested, nominate yourself the official photographer for the day and capture the moments that everyone else is too busy to notice.

With healthy boundaries intact, you will feel less likely to internalize negative comments or interactions.  If you need help working on your boundaries, I'd love to help.

There is no "best way"...

"Perfectionist."

When I saw this word scrawled across the top of one of my papers in college, I instantly felt a sense of pride and accomplishment.  From my earliest days, perfection was the goal in every aspect of my life.  When my 5th grade art teacher gave me a "B" for the semester, I remember telling my mother that "B is for Bad, and I don't get B's!"

Little did I know how being a perfectionist would come back to haunt me in later years, when anxiety almost crippled me and I didn't know how to reconcile the fact that I was not, indeed, perfect.

Many therapy sessions and years of work on my self-worth have helped my perfectionism become grace.  Grace given to myself that I usually saved up for others.  I know that I am not perfect (far from it!) and I know that I still have value and worth.  I can still contribute.  I can still have an impact.  

And I refuse to be paralyzed by the grip of perfectionism anymore.

If I can help you with the anxiety and fear that comes with perfectionism, please reach out. Call me at (816) 200-7626 or email me at krystal@mendedkc.com.

-Krystal

Therapy "lingo" (aka "psychobabble")

CBT, DBT, EMDR, EFCT, MBTI, REBT.  To an outsider, these terms may seem like alphabet soup.  I can't tell you how many times someone has asked what "kind" of therapy I provide.  Well, I can sum it up in one word.

Connection.

My clients feel that I am in their corner, and I am going to help them see their strengths, resources, and ways out of their current struggle.  We talk about how each person is "wired" and how their personality shows up in the world...the good, the bad, and, well, you know the rest. 

I don't love the "lingo" that surrounds the therapeutic process...but I do love the connection and alliance I have with my clients.

If you aren't navigating life well right now, give me a call and I would love to get to know you and walk beside you on your journey.  Welcome to looking forward to getting up in the morning...welcome to looking forward to seeing your spouse at the end of the day...

...welcome to Mended.

-Krystal